Wednesday, August 14, 2013

Life with Mum...

When I thought of my life a few short weeks ago, I was proud of the fact that I had my own home, luxuries, lifestyle... I always wondered why anyone my age would live with their parents.

It's funny.  About a month ago, I was planning a 5 year anniversary trip with my husband for this September.  My step-dad, Jack had commented "Almost 5 years, Alex!  It's all downhill from there!", I joked and said "Knock on wood, Jack.  We haven't made it there yet!" 

Heh, I'm okay with the fact that he didn't knock on wood.

Life with Mum and Jack is pretty humorous.  I find a lot of amusement in my current situation.  I was sleeping in my tasteful queen size bed, in a house decorated in 50 shades of brown.  (We were always trying to sell, so we kept it pretty neutral).

My new room?:  Currently, I am sleeping in a single bed in a lilac room, underneath a fabulous purple unicorn border.   It's full of clothing.  Mums clothing.  Other than that?  The decorations are...interesting to say the least. There are porcelain dolls in there, honestly:  They aren't the creepiest thing I have to contend with.

I used to be very artistic, but I had trouble overcoming my fear of live subjects, so I would regularly draw sketches of myself in front of a mirror for practice.

The sketches?  Every one of them, including a HUGE 2' x 3' charcoal drawing of my grade 10 self are hung in my room. The large charcoal?  It's above my bed.  Yep.  It's an Alex shrine!  Honest to god, if I have anyone over I'm just going to say "Mom keeps those pictures hanging in there justtttttttt in case I come home so intoxicated that I forget which room is mine"...


Upon first moving in, Mum gave me "The Talk".  The talk was about my tendency to jump into relationships.  Here's how it went:

Mum:   "Alex.  I know you like to be in a relationship, but don't jump into one this time."
Alex:   "Yes Mum, I know.  I'm swearing off relationships until I finish my goals on this list."
Mum:    "Well, I know a girl your age has needs."
Alex:   "Mum....."
Mum:    "I was young once too!  I still have needs!  Sometimes..."
Alex:    "MUM!...."
Mum:     "Well, SOMETIMES Alex, I still just HAVE to make the trip upstairs to his bed and..."
Alex:     "Ohgodohgodohgod....."
Mum:      "That's right, dear."

Alex:     *Covers face*
Mum:      "Well all I'm saying is, Alex if you need to get serviced, please, please, please,  just don't bring him home."

Yup.  Now I'm officially a car.  I'd like to think of myself as a BMW for the time being....Maybe a Toyota.  Shouldn't need an oil change for at least another 8000km.


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